Oh, me name is Dick Darby, I'm a cobbler, I served me time at old camp
Some call me an old agitator, but now I'm resolved to repent

With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an idoh
With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an iday
With me roobooboo roobooboo randy
And me lab stone keeps beating away

Now, my father was hung for sheep stealing, my mother was burned for a witch
My sister's a dandy housekeeper, and I'm a mechanical switch

With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an idoh
With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an iday
With me roobooboo roobooboo randy
And me lab stone keeps beating away

Ah, it's forty long years I have travelled, all by the contents of me pack
Me hammers, me awls and me pinchers, I carry them all on me back

With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an idoh
With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an iday
With me roobooboo roobooboo randy
And me lab stone keeps beating away

Oh, my wife she is humpy, she's lumpy, my wife she's the devil, she's black
And no matter what I may do with her, her tongue it goes clickety-clack

With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an idoh
With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an iday
With me roobooboo roobooboo randy
And me lab stone keeps beating away

It was early one fine summer's morning, a little before it was day
I dipped her three times in the river, and carelessly bade her "Good day!"

With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an idoh
With me ingtwing of an ingthing of an iday
With me roobooboo roobooboo randy
And me lab stone keeps beating away