>Finally, the guys side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from
>the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are
>our rules!
>
>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
>down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining
>about you leaving it down.
>
>2. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of
>the tides.Let it be.
>
>3. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think
>of it that way.
>
>4. Crying is blackmail.
>
>5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle
>hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
>Just say it!
>
>6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
>question.
>
>7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
>That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>
>8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a
>doctor.
>
>9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
>In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
>
>10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
>
>11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of
>the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
>
>12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you
>want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do
>it yourself.
>
>13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say
>during commercials.
>
>14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do
>we.
>
>15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default
>settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a
>fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
>
>16. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
>
>17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act
>like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
>the hassle.
>
>18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
>answer you don't want to hear.
>
>19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear
>is fine. Really.
>
>20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
>prepared to discuss such topics as football, the merits of a good pub,
>or girls..
>
>21. You have enough clothes.
>
>22. You have too many shoes.
>
>23. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
>
>24. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on
>the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's
>like camping.
Full Version: A Guys Side Of Things...
hahahaha
Men, you think you're smart and rule women ? As long as this is what you think, everything's alright....
As for me I have only one rule :
If you do not mean to hurt me but don't care about me : keep away.
Men, you think you're smart and rule women ? As long as this is what you think, everything's alright....
As for me I have only one rule :
If you do not mean to hurt me but don't care about me : keep away.
That's going on the wall, nice one ChrisyBhoy.
lets see...how long would Cate put up with that?
I like Camping
but have no wife yet
but have no wife yet
Womens ammendments to the Man's version of the Rules:
1. Leaving the toilet seat up or down is of no importance ... Leave it up or down, doesn't matter. If I get my bum wet, shower time.. want to join? ooopppssss, invitations are only for those that take our needs into account.
2. Sports ... Instead of sitting on your arse in front of the tele, try asking if we wanna go to the match.
3. Shopping is a sport .... Life is what you make of it.. try telling the shop owners it's not a sport as I toss you things to place in the trolley. I just hope that you can catch.
4. Crying is blackmail .... And the 'All that you do for me speech,' isn't?
5. Ask for what you want ... if subtle hints do not work, and strong hints do not work, and the obvious hints do not work, then we just remind ourselves what kind of intelligence factors we are dealing with and proves that women are smarter and more savvy.
6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question ... except those questions that help stroke your ego.
7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it ... if we have a problem that we take to you, it isn't because we want sympathy, it is because we're manipulating you into taking care of the problem for us.
8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem ... years of only hearing part of whats said is a problem, might want to go and see an otolaryngologist.
9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument .... anything you said in an arguement 6 months ago is inadmissible except if it benefits you. It is only inadmissible after 7 days if it is in our favour.
10. If you think you're fat, you probably are ... if we truly thought we were fat you'd be the last we would ask. We only do that to goad you into a compliment or two, just as we compliment you in order to make you believe that you are important and a vital member within the family.
11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ... if you meant it that way then surely you could learn better use and command of the English language. Try a few courses in English Literature.
12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done ... only reason we tell you what to do and then proceed in telling you how to do it is because we assume you'll screw it up like you do everything else. Why woud we do it ourselves when we have you to do it for us.
13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials ... more than happy to accomodate you in that one if you'd be more than happy to do your projects and watch the tele shows that you want when 'our' shows aren't on.
14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we ... like him, without directions you come upon lands of foreign nature and you see whats happened since he went there, guess that is just another fault that we have the men to blame for.
15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings ... All women see things for what they are, and we see men as an ends to a means.
16. If it itches, it will be scratched ... and how much will this cost us?
17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong ... when we say, 'nothing,' that means it is a problem that we do not think that you could possibly understand with you childish mentalities, or that the amount of help we would receive by telling you is so minimal, it just isn't worth the hassle.
18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to .... then that's called a rhetorical question and wasn't meant to be answered and if you don't know the difference then you might want to go back to the University.
19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine ... then I think I would like to wear what I saw that bum wearing on the side of the street, you know, the kind of clothing that hasn't been washed in a few years.
20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, the merits of a good pub, or girls ... did you ever think that when we ask we are actually trying to make small talk because is all we feel that we'll get out of you, or your thoughts.
21. You have enough clothes ... well, you have enough excuses.
22. You have too many shoes .... and you have too many toys. Since when did toys help you get from point A to point B... these shoes were meant for walking and with as much as you like to help, us women do plenty of walking. Consider it an investment that pays off.
23. I am in shape. Round is a shape ... I'm in shape after running around cleaning up after the messes you make getting that 'round' figure.
24. I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping ... did you know we'd rather you have the bed and we GO camping.
1. Leaving the toilet seat up or down is of no importance ... Leave it up or down, doesn't matter. If I get my bum wet, shower time.. want to join? ooopppssss, invitations are only for those that take our needs into account.
2. Sports ... Instead of sitting on your arse in front of the tele, try asking if we wanna go to the match.
3. Shopping is a sport .... Life is what you make of it.. try telling the shop owners it's not a sport as I toss you things to place in the trolley. I just hope that you can catch.
4. Crying is blackmail .... And the 'All that you do for me speech,' isn't?
5. Ask for what you want ... if subtle hints do not work, and strong hints do not work, and the obvious hints do not work, then we just remind ourselves what kind of intelligence factors we are dealing with and proves that women are smarter and more savvy.
6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question ... except those questions that help stroke your ego.
7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it ... if we have a problem that we take to you, it isn't because we want sympathy, it is because we're manipulating you into taking care of the problem for us.
8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem ... years of only hearing part of whats said is a problem, might want to go and see an otolaryngologist.
9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument .... anything you said in an arguement 6 months ago is inadmissible except if it benefits you. It is only inadmissible after 7 days if it is in our favour.
10. If you think you're fat, you probably are ... if we truly thought we were fat you'd be the last we would ask. We only do that to goad you into a compliment or two, just as we compliment you in order to make you believe that you are important and a vital member within the family.
11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ... if you meant it that way then surely you could learn better use and command of the English language. Try a few courses in English Literature.
12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done ... only reason we tell you what to do and then proceed in telling you how to do it is because we assume you'll screw it up like you do everything else. Why woud we do it ourselves when we have you to do it for us.
13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials ... more than happy to accomodate you in that one if you'd be more than happy to do your projects and watch the tele shows that you want when 'our' shows aren't on.
14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we ... like him, without directions you come upon lands of foreign nature and you see whats happened since he went there, guess that is just another fault that we have the men to blame for.
15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings ... All women see things for what they are, and we see men as an ends to a means.
16. If it itches, it will be scratched ... and how much will this cost us?
17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong ... when we say, 'nothing,' that means it is a problem that we do not think that you could possibly understand with you childish mentalities, or that the amount of help we would receive by telling you is so minimal, it just isn't worth the hassle.
18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to .... then that's called a rhetorical question and wasn't meant to be answered and if you don't know the difference then you might want to go back to the University.
19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine ... then I think I would like to wear what I saw that bum wearing on the side of the street, you know, the kind of clothing that hasn't been washed in a few years.
20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, the merits of a good pub, or girls ... did you ever think that when we ask we are actually trying to make small talk because is all we feel that we'll get out of you, or your thoughts.
21. You have enough clothes ... well, you have enough excuses.
22. You have too many shoes .... and you have too many toys. Since when did toys help you get from point A to point B... these shoes were meant for walking and with as much as you like to help, us women do plenty of walking. Consider it an investment that pays off.
23. I am in shape. Round is a shape ... I'm in shape after running around cleaning up after the messes you make getting that 'round' figure.
24. I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping ... did you know we'd rather you have the bed and we GO camping.
XDD Very good answer :-)
Sl�n,
Keltic_Banshee
Sl�n,
Keltic_Banshee
all these years and that was the problem!
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